* * *
Kenny has an esoteric fashion sense. Actually, I should say, “terrible,” but I’m trying to be nice to the guy since he’s doing me a favor. So, when I saw him that morning, I was trying my hardest to keep him in my good graces.
“I don’t need to borrow a suit Kenny,” I said. “I’m renting a tuxedo.”
“Don’t you think that’s overkill?”
“No. It is a fancy dinner; white tie and tails, and all that.”
Kenny shrugged. “It is pretty expensive to rent a tux, you go the cash?”
“I just made some last night, actually,” I said. “Besides, last time I relied on you, I got stuck in a stupid monkey suit.”
He had been half drunk when I explained that my ‘monkey suit’ was ripped, and I needed to get a new one to some wedding a few months ago. He said to leave it to him. I should have been suspicious when he didn’t ask me what my measurements were. When he arrived, I was exasperated.
“Look,” He had said. “I know this is an ape, alright? Beggars can’t be choosers.”
I never did a get a thank-you letter from the Horaces. Though, I think my judgment must have been inhibited when I said to myself, yes, wearing this is better than the suit jacket that has a slight tear on the shoulder. This is a good decision. My decisions have been getting much better since then, and I think that renting a tux was the right decision.
“Look Kenny, just come with me, let’s grab the tux, then we can go take care of the morning shift at the lanes, right?”
“Yeah,” Kenny said. “Dad said he doesn’t mind covering the night shift for us.”
It was decided; Kenny liked to tag along with me on these sorts of little excursions. It took us a few tries to find a place open this early in the morning. Kenny didn’t even understand why I was putting in this much effort, since I was going to ruin it with Susan when I told her I had lied to her.
“Kenny, I can’t blow it with her; she thinks I'm gay.”
“You can’t say it that way. You blow dudes not women,” Kenny said. “Well, you, specifically, don’t blow dudes, but—”
“The talking? Make it stop. Please.”