Monday, April 29, 2013

I Had a Good First Draft, Then I Had to Try Again

No references today. The table of contents are here. Ok, references, for those of you who don't know much about women's fashion or plays.

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“Try again. That answer? It is unacceptable,” Lucy told me. Tanya had walked away from Lucy, a sort of tacit demonstration of who was in command. Who was in command? Not me.

“But it did seem like a good idea at the time,” I said.

“So did skorts! But, on further reflection, we all realized they are horrible.”

“What’s a skort?”

“Like we just saw, a travesty of judgment,” Lucy said, grabbing her clipboard to her chest and walking away. In my defense, it really did seem like a good idea. Old people like Astaire and Ginger; old people buy knives. Then again, maybe they don’t. They don’t have teeth, so they probably just eat soft things anyway.

That’s about the point in my answer that Lucy told me to try again. “Besides,” she said. “They might have dentures. So, they do need knives.”

“So, you’re coming round to my point of view?” You’ll be amazed how often you can be told to try again. It was like that play where they hit a bell whenever the guy stumbles and insults the girl; only this time, instead of pretending it never happened, I get real-time feedback that this was unacceptable. If this conversation were an arcade game, I’d be broke.

What I’m saying is, I think Lucy is unappreciative of thinking outside the box.

“I love boxes! Why should you think outside of the box? The box is safety! Where do you put puppies to be adopted? In the warm, safe confines of a box!”

I don’t know what her thing with puppies is. But, I did try to say that puppies want to be outside the box, where they can frolic and play. “Puppies don’t know what is best for puppies,” She said. “I do. Just like now.”

“Tanya seems to think it was a good idea.”

“Then go tell her how wonderful the two of you were!”

“I think she knows,” I said. “She’s a smart lady.”

“Does that mean you think I’m not?” Lucy said. I was kind of shocked this had taken that turn, so I paused a moment to get my bearings.

“Of course I don’t think that. I’m just saying that we have a difference of opinion here,”

“No. You’re just wrong. Try again!” So on, so forth, until she stormed out. It was a real shame too, because Tanya said she had a really good idea for what to do next and had asked me to run it by Lucy.

I had the sneaking suspicion that was a bad idea, so when I found Tanya I just said: “She said try again.”

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